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What Would Jesus Do At Camp?

It looks as if al Qaeda is getting a little competition from a small camp in North Dakota. Indeed, Jesus camp, as its referred to, is intended to brainwish little children into thinking they’re doing God’s will versus the will of some group of zealots trying to force the world to accept their distorted view of their religion.

Activities include speaking in tongues, weeping for salvation, and worshipping God through images like those of mister bastion of Christianity himself, George W. Bush.

I would think that would teeter on idoltry – a big no, no in the Christian faith – but I’m sure camp organizers have already found some bullshit excuse for that. I’m sure there’s even one that doesn’t disclose the amount of money handed over to them by Republicans.

Pastor Becky Fisher of Kids in Ministry International and head of the cult says about the camp, “I want to see them as radically laying down their lives for the gospel, as they are in Pakistan, in Israel and in Palestine.” That message has surely been relayed to one of the campers interviewed in this ABC news piece: “Training to be warriors in a much funner way,” says the young child without clue.

Yes, starting wars rooted in the belief that your God is better than the next person’s God sounds so much fun. Of course you’d want to mimic the suicide bombers and mass murderers of those countries.

There’s more good news. According to the report, in the last decade and a half enrollment at Christian colleges has soared 70% and the sells of Christian music has skyrocketed 300%.

This next Crusades will be so much better than the last one visually. We’ll all get to see ourselves blown to pieces.

So much for a new wave of [peaceful] secularism.

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