Stay Where You’re At

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Now that she’s achieved her greatest accomplishment in life – duplicating Lil Kim’s fuck up – Foxy ‘Don’t Call Me Doo Doo’ Brown is reaching out to her fans. Gavin, Spragga, the members of the Fox Boogie message board (if it’s still up), ya’ll out there?

Brown’s camp has set something up for ya’ll.

Fans of incarcerated rapper Foxy Brown will now be able to communicate directly with her via a newly launched website. will feature up-to-the-minute updates on the rapper, who was personally involved in creating the content contained on the site.

Up-to-the-minute updates? From prison? Why does anyone need to know what time she ate a bologna sandwich at Rikers? Or how many lies she told during the hour they let her out of her cell?

The new website is the latest achievement for the rapper, who has released three solo albums and been featured on songs by LL Cool J, Nas, Case and Toni Braxton.

Don’t laugh. That’s mean.

“I devoted my career to building an affinity with my fans who have supported me unflinchingly and no barbed wire fence or prison wall will stop that,” Brown said in a statement. “I am in great spirits and very focused, and needed a forum to communicate to the people.”

I think I’ll write her.

Dear Inga,

Have we learned anything yet? Do you we understand that it’s important to obey the law and not steal, lie, or swing at a Korean? Have we fully grasped that only rich blonds in LA can get away with the type of nonsense you tried to pull? Will we stop faking pregnancies once we’re released for good behavior? Are we going to act like sane law abiding citizens now? And since I have your attention, will you knock it off with the purple lipstick? Now-and-later lips aren’t sexy.

Have someone send me my Free Fox Boogie t-shirt.

And just because I used to like your work, I’m going to drop you some reading material.

Dutty yeah,


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