Barack on Good Times: I Got High

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Possibly calling his weed man.

As we all know (or at least should know) most politicians are liars who will tell you anything to win your vote. If you tell a politician your child is a functioning illiterate, they’ll promise you old footage of Reading Rainbow and all the Curious George your heart desires.

If you speak on the plight of the poor, they will say they feel your pain as they rush to the exit to make their $500-a-plate fundraising gala on time.

Ask a politician their favorite Biblical verse and you’ll be sure to get anything from distorted lines of religious prayers to Yolanda Adams lyrics.

If you’re anti-war, they’ll tell you they’re all for bringing the troops home — though they remain reluctant to share any of the blame for giving President Bush the authority to go to war in the first place, will add that we can’t just pull out now, and more than likely won’t share with voters that they just voted for a bill with the same language that Bush and co. could use to invade Iran (Hello, Hillary).

But what politicians like to lie about most is their actions before they entered public life. If George Bush were forthright with his past as a cokehead, I’d be more sympathetic to his dimwitted decisions in foreign policy.

Then again, not saying anything is a lot less irritating than the Clintonian way of answering a question – which dictates you pop, lock, and drop around any tough question thrown at you, opting instead to throw out a lot of words without saying much of anything.

Take for instance, Bill Clinton’s response to a question about Monica Lewinsky in a deposition over the Paula Jones/Monica Lewinsky matter:

It depends on what the meaning of the word ‘is’ is. If the–if he–if ‘is’ means is and never has been, that is not–that is one thing. If it means there is none, that was a completely true statement. . . . Now, if someone had asked me on that day, are you having any kind of sexual relations with Ms. Lewinsky, that is, asked me a question in the present tense, I would have said no. And it would have been completely true.

You know what, he’s married, he’s the President, and he is a living testament to the song “Area Codes,” so in some respects I can understand why he chose to argue over semantics rather than be more forthright about playtime with his favorite intern. But one thing I never got was his response to a question about whether or not he’s ever used drugs.

“I tried marijuana once. I did not inhale.”

Say what? That’s like saying, “I only put the head in.” It’s like you’re admitting you dabbled in illegal activities, but only a little bit. My lips are guilty, but not my lungs. Whatever.

It looks like I’m not the only one who feels that answer is nonsense.

At a town hall meeting in Iowa, Barack Obama was asked whether or not he inhaled.

“I did. It’s not something I’m proud of. It was a mistake as a young man. But I never understood that line,” Mr. Obama said, pausing to recall Mr. Clinton’s insistence that he didn’t inhale. “The point was to inhale. That was the point.”

My cynicism dictates I point out that he already acknowledged this in Dreams of My Father, a book he wrote before he entered public office. He even admitted to trying cocaine, so essentially he had no choice to own up to it. But, I want to believe he was honest about it because he wanted to be.

Yeah, yeah even I can give people a chance.

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