Stop Touching Up Her Body

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Have you ever looked at Mariah Carey and wondered just what the hell does she really look like?

If you told me Mariah Carey looked like a big Black man named Percy in person, I would believe you,because she damn sure doesn’t look like this photo.

The Miracle of Adobe continues its unnatural havoc on Mariah Carey’s promotional posters. Sure, it’s a lovely picture: Too bad that’s not Mariah Carey’s face or body.

Whatever graphic design genius Mariah has working on her promotional shots deserves an award. I bet he could make Michael Jackson look like Akon if you paid him enough overtime.

I may be a lamb on the low, but I have to be honest. After years of wine and anti-depressants, Mariah’s face has taken on a more rotund shape. Think Miss Piggy. But thanks to Photoshop, they always have her looking like Jessica Rabbit. That’s just not believable.

There’s nothing wrong with Miss Piggy, Mimi. I actually think it’s appropriate considering Jermaine Dupri has the same shoe size as Kermit T. Frog.

Be natural, my biracial butterfly. We’ll still love you.

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