I realize this is a touchy subject for many, but I can’t just ignore these idiots on both sides who pretend to have God’s cell number.
This time, there’s a pray-off going on. On one side – God’s side, apparently – are the evangelicals who represent John McCain. The other side – that probably only exists in the mind’s of the other side – are the seedy, diabolical, and dark (in color and outlook) witches for Obama.
They write (and preface with “THIS IS VERY SERIOUS”):
IF YOU KNOW HOW TO DO SPIRITUAL WARFARE, PLEASE PRAY TODAY AND CONTINUALLY THAT ALL SUCH CURSES BE BROKEN AND SATAN’S PLAN FOR AMERICA BE DEFEATED, IN JESUS’ NAME. PRAY AND COVER MCCAIN AND PALIN WITH THE BLOOD OF CHRIST. IF YOU DO NOT KNOW HOW TO DO SPIRITUAL WARFARE, IT IS TIME YOU LEARN!!!
Claiming:
She said the witches, warlocks and those involved in satanism and the occult get up daily at 3 a.m. to release curses against McCain and Palin so B. Hussein Obama is elected.
And:
They say “he is the chosen one”. She said Obama’s grandmother sacrificed a black and a white chicken to the “goddess of the river” so both whites and blacks will vote for Obama. All Islam loves and worships Obama. The world is mesmerized by him. Oprah’s 200 million followers are out to elect Obama.
Do you think they baked or fried that chicken after they were done?
Oh yeah:
The occultists are “weaving lazy 8′s around McCain’s mind to make him look confused and like an idiot”. Bree K. said we need to break these curses off of him that are being sent from Kenya.
By God she means those crooked people the McCain/Palin campaign hired to disenfranchise voters in swing states. How can anyone not look at this woman and think of a pretty crash dummy?
There are dead people with more brain cells than Sarah Palin. I really can’t stand that dumb ass woman or people who think just like her. I’m sure that God loves everyone – including all of his genetic failures like these simple ass people – but I don’t have to.
I’m not going to pray for it (that is stupid), but I wouldn’t be mad if Jesus dropped one of his sandals on Sarah Palin’s head.
The next time I leave without my CDs, I think I might opt to drive in silence.
After I finished voting (It’s the Barr Baby Obama ’08!), I decided I wanted some fried chicken. If you’re wondering whether or not I felt bad about following up a vote for a Black man for president with eating fried chicken at 9:30 in the morning, I did not. Besides it was Chick-fil-A and the chicken was on a multi-grain bagel. That shit doesn’t count.
I did dance around while eating it, though.
Anyway, on the way there I heard what I thought was some corny rap song. It turns out it’s actually a commercial for some place called Antoine Dental. I should have known after they shouted out Medicaid. I guess if your smile ain’t bright but your insurance is light, there are people there looking out for you. I can get over Antonie for the Boosie inspired commercial, but I can’t cut for what I heard next.
While waiting for the rude ass girl to take my order in the drive-thru, I heard some woman talk about her dense sister. She said her sister doesn’t plan to vote because she heard Barack Obama was a radical Muslim that Osama bin Laden sent to run for President to destroy America. She heard this on YouTube.
Why are people like that free to roam the streets? I didn’t think about it at the time, but I wish I had called in and said I was sent by Planned Parenthood to tell her sister that she needed to be spayed. If that sounds too harsh, shouldn’t people like her be sentenced to a place where literary or reference materials – let’s call them books for argument’s sake – are kept for use but not for sale? That way you can like learn things and I don’t know, come to the realization that any clown can make up some bullshit on YouTube for a sucker to believe?
“A gentleman is one who never hurts anyone’s feelings unintentionally.” — Oscar Wilde
“A misogynist is a woman-hating asshole who acts as if his mother breast fed him sour milk, and has decided to take it out on every woman for the rest of his life.” — Michael
I was reading a couple of the response to this video on a couple of sites and most were limited to a bunch of comments like “Fuck that bitch,” “Freeky is that n-gga,” “Move on to the next bitch,” and “stuck up bitch.”
But, there were a few who seemed to object. Like cbarne22 on Youtube who wrote: “thats not kool! u cant treat bitches like dat!” Hmm…word?
After watching that drunk, I read that Larry Johnson allegedly told a woman he was going to kill her boyfriend and then proceeded to spit in her face at a club. This is the fourth time in five years he’s been accused of assaulting a woman. In a perfect world he’d be in jail already being forced into doing the “Singles Ladies” choreography by his incarecrated yet feminist cellmate.
I can only imagine what it’s like being a woman sometimes. FYI, female readers, if some man disrespects you to that degree, I wouldn’t be mad if I read one of ya’ll decided to slice dude’s balls off fling them with a slingshot.
I can’t stand women like her. In her warped sense of reality her interpretation of Christianity affords her the right to be discriminatory towards people different from her. She wouldn’t know Jesus if he bitch slapped her with a ham sandwich. Normally, I try to ignore people like this, but since some of these yokels actually vote, you can’t ignore them altogether (at least until we get the results).
Until Sunday, I hadn’t heard any major political figure respond to the question of whether or not Barack Obama was a Muslim with, “So what if he was?” Thankfully, Colin Powell said what I was hoping one of the presidential candidates would say: There’s nothing wrong with being a Muslim.
When I grew up, I was usually considered the oddball around Black folk just for being raised Catholic amid a sea of Baptists. I can only imagine what it’s like being a Muslim – especially now when the terms Muslim and terrorist have become interchangeable.
One of my favorite people from Howard is Muslim. She is one of the kindest, funniest, most sincere people I have ever met. Just yesterday I was talking about this video and she joked with me about how she’s seen and heard everything – including some people secretly tricking her into going to a revival.
As long as I’ve known my friend not once has she imposed her religious beliefs on me. Not once has she ever referred to me as an infidel. Not once have I ever asked her something idiotic (I don’t think).
But to this woman, all of my friend’s good qualities would be negated by her belief in Islam. Same for Obama’s mother being agnostic. Last time I checked no agnostics started a holy war. If I knew where this woman lived I would show up at her doorstep dressed like Malcolm X. Or Bishop Don Juan.
I think at the core, both Islam and Christianity are religions of peace, good will, and all of that stuff that would make Barney, Big Bird, and Mother Winslow smile. Too bad backwards, bucktooth (takes one to know one), big mouth jackasses bastardize both faiths and bring shame to both faith’s followers.
One could ask this woman if she’s so gung ho about following her faith to the letter, why would she be supporting John McCain? Where the McCain campaign labels Barack’s “redistribution of wealth” comments as socialism Christ would call fair play; last time I checked, aiding the poor was his thing.
Then there’s the war, which probably isn’t going over too well right now up there. You could also point to John McCain and Sarah Palin running a racially divisive campaign that attempts overcome their shortfalls by playing on the prejudices of dimwits like her.
But no, that would all make too much sense, and would require her to actually think about Christ and then come to the realization of how unchristian she truly is.
Jesus be her recurring nightmare of an Obama administration.
P.S. While I have you, if there are any Muslims reading can one of you explain to me what’s with Muslims for McCain? That’s like Klansman for Jesse Jackson.
White people: some of your folk take us for fools. You mean to tell me taking Obama’s face, a bucket of chicken, watermelon, Kool-Aid and ribs and slapping them on a food stamp has no racist implications? Maybe that type of failed logic goes over well with the cousin-fucking crowd, but not everyone is that dense.
I was hoping with this election more people would be forthright about their racism. That what we can get a little dialogue going; we can’t really move forward if people don’t come clean about their prejudices and stereotyping. But the bulk of these bigots seem to bitch up when given the golden opportunity to share their views in front of an audience.
So to lead by example:
1. Have you ever eaten Chinese food and felt like barking afterwards? I have sometimes, particularly after eating General Tso’s Mystery Meat from this Chinese take-out place in D.C. Then a friend took me to a place called Olive and Sesame in B-More. The best sesame chicken I’ve ever had and I’m confident it came from an actual bird. I felt really bad about my ignorance thereafter. Then again, was I wrong for realizing the “chicken” from the other place tasted like like Laffy Taffy?
2. When I’m driving and I’m cut-off and almost turned into a crash dummy, I instinctively assume it’s a Mexican behind the wheel. I would try to maintain political correctness and say I’m usually wrong, but that would be lying and lying is wrong. Sorry, my brown brethren, but you know some of your folk can’t drive. Then again, I’ve only parallel parked once and when I first started driving I scared some of my friends. I believe some of them are still afraid. They’re just punks, though.
3. I’m not normally afraid of Arabs, but there was this one time I considered calling the snitch line after watching someone on the bus in D.C. In my defense, I had just seen a special that spotlighted Arabs who cut their hair to try and look Hispanic in order to fool their way into the country and blow it up. I was a little paranoid for a minute. Anyway, I thought this guy was Hispanic until I saw his some of what he was writing. It looked like he was taking notes. He caught me watching, and proceeded to stare me down as if he were about to declare a personal jihad against me. Maybe he thought I was going to rob him. That would normally warrant the side-eye, but hell, two Black men jacked me at gun point, too. Go figure!
4. I don’t think white people are inherently nasty the way others do, but when Bristol Palin licked her hand and rubbed it on her little brother’s head at the Republican convention, that wasn’t helping discount that theory. Neither does sitting on the ground in a public street having a picnic. I’m referring to notoriously clean streets of New York where rats the size of Serena’s ass skip around the street in broad daylight. I can’t tell you how many times I saw that. Eww, vanilla. Eww.
On the other hand, fast-food restaurants in predominately white areas tend to be way cleaner than the ones ’round my way. Don’t be mad. It’s true.
5. Sometimes I just hate Black people.
You see? Was that so hard?
We all dabble in stereotypes, and some of them are spot on but most of them are dead wrong. I can admit I’m sometimes ignorant and I can do better, why can’t these folks admit they’re racist as hell? That’s the only way any of us can use those food stamps to buy them a clue.
I met Michelle Williams a couple of years ago interning at a radio station. She had the personality of a much larger person. As funny and witty as she is, though, I don’t think this solo career thing is going to pan out.
While I love my sister in skinny, when you’re built like Cruella Deville and you sing like Lily Pickles, chances are sales won’t be too high for you. The fact that her album only sold about 14,000 its opening week only makes it all the more obvious Mabel should hit up Careerbuilder.
When her label finally decides that Beyonce’s friends can only go so far with their money, what can Michelle do in the meantime?
I’m thinking she could:
1. Lead an expedition to find Kelly Rowland’s backbone. That should keep her busy.
2. Pray Catwoman gets a sequel. Then hope it’s a musical.
3. Become a crossing guard.
4. Host a radio show. Maybe Mabel in the Morning?
5. Take her mother, move down to Miami and share a house with a naive Midwesterner and a geriatric southern vixen.
Watching the three presidential debates will teach you one important lessons: Assholes should take acting classes prior to appearing before the nation. Regardless of whether you slept through the first debate, flipped back-and-forth during the second and third debates, or like me watched all three of the sleep-inducing debates in their entirety, you can probably spot out the obvious: John McCain can’t stand Barack Obama.
Not only does McCain not respect Obama, he likely believes he’s beneath him. That explains why the throughout each debate millions of smartasses waited for McCain to yell, “GET OFF MY LAWN, OBAMA!” I’m sure for John it was either channeling Mr. Wilson or lift his T-Rex-like arms to take a swing to convey his displeasure.
The most interesting thing about the debates was watching how many different ugly faces McCain made in response to whatever Barack was saying at the time. There was the “you look like you smell” face, the “I’m going to need some prunes later” face, and the more constant of the three — the “How in the hell did your ass get here?” face.
And when he wasn’t visibly grimacing Obama’s way – that is, after he finally started to acknowledge he was there in the second debate – he was being condescending as hell towards him.
As many times McCain uttered the phrase “He doesn’t understand,” one would think Barack Obama drooled when he spoke. Speaking of that, McCain obviously felt compelled to point out how “eloquent” Obama was. Essentially: “He says his words so fancy; too bad nann one of those words makes a lick of sense – tall bastard.”
Why didn’t he just flat out say, “Obama is a know-it-all who doesn’t know anything.” Then Mr. Cool, Calm, and Collective (or sedated) could have finally melted a little bit and point out what a befuddled old man McCain typically sounds like. Word to Joe the Plumber.
Granted, this last debate was the most substantive of the three, but if John McCain really hates Obama so much why didn’t he seize the opportunity to verbalize it more with him sitting there next to him?
That would have made for a much more engaging debate than watching John McCain show his ass repeatedly. You would think when Satan is besting you in favorability ratings and your poll numbers reminding people of artic temperatures one would try your best to appear more likable.
A friend of mine always talks about a plan to send trifling Black people to The Island — some remote place far, far away where embarrassing coloreds are free to coon for a coconut out of the watchful eye of civilization.
I think it’s about time we get this plan going.
We can start with him. I don’t mind Black Republicans in theory. I think we should all be grateful that Black people are getting more opportunities to be just as wrong as white people.
But, there are two types of Black Republicans. One group consists of the people who actually are conservative. That group honestly believes that John McCain will make this country better. While that idea is as senile as McCain is old, their support is sincere so I guess they can stay.
Now the other set consists of the likes of James T. Harris. These people say they’re conservatives, but they’re opportunists first and foremost. As your stomach turns at the sight of James T. (the ‘T’ might stand for Trapped on McCain’s nuts) Harris gaze into McCain’s eyes and beg him passionately to attack Obama, remind yourself that this Negro is trying to be put on.
Harris types know that in the media, if any member of an oppressed group (be it based on ethnicity, gender, or sexual orientation), appears on-air and plays the role of contrarian that they’re likely to gain a lot of exposure and thus more $$$.
When he compares Obama supporters to Hitler youth on his blog, and kisses up to McCain when the cameras are on, he’s motivated by self-interest.
He and others like him must go.
When did Elmo die?
Whenever I’m riding with the kinfolk that’s a detention officer, he points out random kids and says, “They gon’ be at my job.” Normally, I say you don’t know that, but looking at this video I’m thinking this lil’ boy will be at his job.
If your two-year-old can recite Shawty Lo lyrics before their ABCs, you’re setting that kid up for a life that includes developing a fear of dropping soap bars.
Over the weekend I spent two minutes of my life trying to figure out what the hell this was. I would compare this show to Sambo, but Sambo deserves better.
On the show’s site the creator says:
“I care about the way Blacks are depicted just as much as the next man and I want to change all of that. The only difference is… I’m not trying to do that on a television show, I’m trying to do it through a television show … a show that’s smart, clever, has edgy humor and deals with relevant issues that are going on in our society. I hope you enjoy. Thank you.”
I saw a stupid dude say an ultrasound photo proves the child isn’t his because the baby looked lightskinned. Another scene featured a group of people playing a game of strip seance.
BYE! He may talk like the last slave standing, but Plies can read. Goons don’t start scholarship funds, nor do they break character and enuciate in interviews. Aren’t you tired of frauds like him and Officer Ross. At this rate he’ll be exploiting that porn of him banging Rent-A-Ass until he’s 75. Can we at least ship his dick to the island?
I don’t want to hear her talk about Jay-Z anymore. Not to mention Jesus will be back on Earth doing the Stanky Leg before she ever drops another album, so bon voyage boogie. It should be good for her; she stays fronting like she’s from an island anyway.
A man who lately walks around like he’s been looking like he’s been hit by a smooth criminal is calling someone else out on being unoriginal. If that weren’t enough, not only does he need glasses, he needs a hearing aid because all of his songs sound the same to me.
Also, bragging about having sex at 9 with a 15-year-old ain’t hot; it’s a felony. Sidenote: I’m surprised he could even tell Chris Brown was musty because he always seems to be up his ass. This isn’t the first time he’s mentioned Chris Brown. Does he owe you a check or something?
Barack Obama’s candidacy proves that this country as a whole has made incredible strides in terms of race relations. Barack Obama’s candidacy also proves that the success of The Cosby Show and Mariah Carey have given many people a false sense of reality. When I hear Black people kirk out over the sentiment that racism is still around, I get annoyed. Even worse is talking to Black people who seem uncomfortable around other Black people. I bet if you put the put people like that on an island full of Black people the truth will backhand them.
Alright. That’s the first list for now. More on the way. Feel free to leave your suggestions to the list in the comments.
Oh and my white friends, I got ya’ll, too. I’ll be creating a list of white people who need to be sent to the desert soon enough.
Many like to pretend they’re not prejudice, yet whenever presented with the opportunity to show their asses, racists tend to give the world a full moon. Look no further than Dr. Arnold Conrad, a minister who delivered the invocation at a McCain rally in Iowa over the weekend.
“I would also pray, Lord, that your reputation is involved in all that happens between now and November, because there are millions of people around this world praying to their god—whether it’s Hindu, Buddha, Allah—that his opponent wins, for a variety of reasons,” said the minister delivering it. “And Lord, I pray that you will guard your own reputation, because they’re going to think that their God is bigger than you, if that happens. So I pray that you will step forward and honor your own name with all that happens between now and election day.”
In other words: “Lord, these heathens and their Democrat are trying to do you. Are you going to go out like that? On November 4th, please show them who run it and let John McCain win. He approves your message — unlike that Muslim Barack HUSSEIN Obama.
P.S. Did I tell you that Barack is Black, too?”
Do you know what this reminds me of? Those people who claim to be so holy but only use religion to belittle, berate, and bitch out people.
Have you ever been at a family gathering and some old fool pisses the whole room off by using Jesus to talk slick during the blessing?
Something like:
“Bless us Oh Lord and these gifts which we are about to receive. We want to thank you for bringing us all together. We especially thank you for allowing Kevin to be with us. Bless the store owner who didn’t press charges because we all know Kevin only has one strike left. We also want to thank you for your continued blessings. We are so grateful Lord. Bless those who are generous, and forgive those who take advantage of such generousity — like Ronda who can walk in here with a new purse yet she can’t pay me back that $50 she owes me. It’s OK, Lord. I know my blessing will come. We also pray that you keep this family together despite the inner turmoil that outsiders, namely new wives and their uncouthed children have brought us. Spare the rod, spoil the child is all I’m saying, God. And dear Lord, let us learn from our mistakes and the condoms that break…”
…and on and on they’ll go until someone sucks their teeth loud enough to signal a fight might ensue if the yams get cold.
Same slick talk, different prayer.
The McCain campaign must take those not rolling with Joe Six Pack for suckers. While McCain did acknowledge that Obama was not an American hating Islamic jihadist when one of his supporters called him an Arab on camera, his campaign, and in particular Sarah Palin, have been purposely preying upon the stupidity and intolerance of the bigot voting bloc for weeks now.
They enjoy the likes of Reverend Conrad. After you finish reading this post, I ask that each of you pray that God drops some tolerance into his skull. Or at the very least, can you pray someone tells Rev. Arnie that “Hindu” is not a God. That way, if he’s going to bash someone else’s beliefs, he’ll at least know what he’s talking about.
You can drop that clown an early hint at: aconrad105@mchsi.com.
I never intend to be disappointed on purpose. It may happen more than I would like, but I never want to be disappointed and I particularly hate it when I’m disappointed with someone I throw a lot of support behind. Now, I understand that we are in a recession, but a value menu budget should never stifle combo levels of creativity.
If your video is called “Bust Your Windows” shouldn’t you actually bust someone’s videos? Standing around trying to look sexy and wasting alcohol doesn’t really scream, “Take that, punk ass.” If someone did that to me I could easily go back and say, “Bitch so what? The liquor store ain’t closed yet.”
I really love this song, but this video almost ruins it for me. For once, I’m actually grateful music channels no longer play music videos.
I could have shot a better video with my Sony digital camera and a brick, and I bet it my treatment would make a hell of a lot more sense than hers. Before I continue on with my tangent, can I just point out that the 80s inspired black background in the video had me thinking that Vanity was about to pop out at a second.
This is a really really bad video. I almost want to bust her windows for this bullshit. I truly don’t get the point of it. She might as well have taken his car to the car wash.
The only comfort that I found in this video is a new fun fact: Jazmine Sullivan looks just like Snuffalufagus.
Since you didn’t see nann window busted in Snuffy Sullivan’s video, at least tell me you see the resemblance.
