Plug The Leak

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While people are still laughing at Keyshia Cole for dressing like the chick that gave JJ Evans VD on that episode of Good Times at the De La Hoya fight, many have been distracted from news of her true crime: Fucking up a Mary J. Blige song.

As odd as it may be in hindsight, Mary J. Blige’s My Life was my shit. It doesn’t matter if I was 10. The album was good. And one of my favorite songs from the album is “I Love You.” When word leaked that Keyshia Cole was going to remake the track with Lil’ Wayne, I had a feeling it was going to turn out awful.

But to call it awful would be like saying the U.S. economy is only slighty bad. Or that O.J. Simpson is only a little stupid.

I know the remake was intended to pay homage to Mary, but after listening to it I can’t help but wonder if Mary owes Keyshia money or slept with her man? You would think it was a diss record. You mad, Keyshia?

I happen to like Keyshia Cole. I like the fact that she’s trying really hard to better herself. Sure, she’s been looking like Betty Boop and the Roadunner in the process, but you can’t knock a girl for trying.

But back to this song. I don’t get the logic. She’s already compared to Mary, and when she decides to cover one of her songs, she goes and records something like that? She was smart enough not to include this on her album. It would have been even smarter to destroy any record of this song ever being recorded.

She better be lucky Mary is fine, fine, fine, fine, fine now. If we were talking ’95 Mary she might have cracked open a crack pipe and cut up Keyshia. Man down.

I would place some of the blame on Wayne, too, but given the fact that he’d add his rhymes to the original Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles theme song if offered, I already knew he didn’t care if the song sounded good or not.

But Keyshia ought to know better. I don’t want to encourage Black on Black violence, but I wouldn’t be mad if Mary and Kendu jump them.

As I write this, D’Angelo’s cover of Prince’s “She’s Always In My Hair” just came on my iPod. Now that’s a remake. Granted, I can barely understand a word he’s saying, but at least his mumbles are on key. Live and learn, Keyshia. Live and learn.

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