Wednesday, January 14, 2009
11:56 PM

Tell Me

1. What does Teyana Taylor actually do again?

2. Will Lil’ Kim ever hop off of Biggie’s dead dick?

3. Ya’ll know he knows the entire “Single Ladies” routine, right?

4. She may claim to be now clean, but does Amy Winehouse realize we know she’s about as drug free as a blunt?

5. Do you think it’s dawned on 50 Cent that he’s fast approaching Ja Rule status?

6. Will Sarah Palin ever fade into oblivion like all of the other failed Vice Presidential candidates?

7. Can we retire the word swagger or at least let it take an extended vacation?

8. Although the gay rumors must be annoying, is Ne-Yo helping his cause when he says things like, “Prince made me feel like a school girl?”

9. Speaking of Ne-Yo, am I the only one who feels that if you’ve heard one Ne-Yo the Negro song, you’ve heard them all?

10. Don’t you feel a little bad for Brandy?

11. Does Prince owe Rihanna child support?

12. Was Seven Pounds supposed to be a voyeuristic equivalent of a sleeping pill?

13. Since there’s a 22-year-old selling her virginity to the highest bidder online, I’m thinking about selling my self-respect online via Craiglist. How much do you think I can get?

14. Are we really blaming Beyonce for the economic crisis? Really?

15. If that’s the case, should we blame “Stanky Leg” for our America’s shitty health care system?

16. Why are people treating inauguration like it’s All Star Weekend?

17. What the hell is a Bromance?

18. Now that her ex-husband has declared he’s broke, does that mean The Greedy Ex-Wife of Bankhead, Sheree Whitfield will have to work like the rest of us?

19. Bank of America is going back to the government for more money after already getting $25 billion in aid. When the hell am I getting a bailout?

20. Will someone please tell Diddy Puff’s Black ass that he will never be the Black Bond?

Labels: Uncategorized
The Cynical Ones.
posted by Michael Arceneaux at 11:56 PM | Comments

Comments

  1. Taj says:
    January 15, 2009 at 2:44 am

    I think we`re on the same wavelength.. I have not a clue about any of them.

    Good job. ^_^

  2. Anonymous says:
    January 15, 2009 at 7:11 am

    1. Gropes older women
    2. Most likely…not.
    3. Well, he was the choreographer.
    4. Let's just leave that alone..
    5. He is Ja Rule – in disguise.
    6. Yeah. It's happening, slowly but surely.
    7. When Weezy does, so will "swagger".
    8. He's just joining the group of many male celebrities who admit to finding Prince attractive.
    9. I swear!
    10. Yes. I wake up a 5 in the morning and tune into Moesha just so I won't feel so bad knowing she was once pretty relevant.
    11. Prince pays no one.
    12. Felt like it. Luckily my fellow movie-goers were there to keep me up.
    13. She's still on that??!!
    14. Of course! Because every single person in America listens to her music, so that theory makes sense.
    15. I guess?
    16. Self-explanatory.
    17. The closest word you can use to describe you & your boys' relationship before admitting you're gay.
    18. No. She's getting ready to fauxstunt for us on Season 2.
    19. Soon since the president is black. Well, that's what some black folk seem to think.
    20. Just think of him as Kim and Bond as Biggie's enchilada.

  3. Miss Yasmine says:
    January 15, 2009 at 9:45 am

    i’m rolling!

  4. Dr. Kiti says:
    January 15, 2009 at 8:14 pm

    I’m attending the inauguration because of its historical value. There is no guarantee that we’ll see another brown person sworn into office so I wann be there. Plus, Obama kinda looks like my daddy…I’ve had to do a couple double takes ;)

  5. Jazz says:
    January 15, 2009 at 8:50 pm

    Hillarious!

    Somebody pls tell CB that’s geigh!
    *sidenote* I can’t stand that lil boy.

    Sarah Palin will go away the exact day Beyonce does. So that’ll be Nevuary 15th 2030.

    Inaugeration is All Star Weekend LOL. I’m glad I live in DC

    Bromance= Super Geigh

    Sheree will be selling She by Sheree out of the local Popeye’s on the next season of RHOATL

    I want my bailout too. Plus the stimulus I never received, bastids.

    Fluffy knows that role will be given to Will Smith. He’s the black Tom Cruise!

  6. Anonymous says:
    January 16, 2009 at 11:18 am

    16. People feel the same way about the Inauguration OF THE FIRST BLACK PRESIDENT EVER (just in case you forgot) as you do about Howard homecoming. That’s why it’s All-Star Weekend.

  7. Anonymous says:
    January 17, 2009 at 10:43 am

    1. She acts relevant.
    2. Will she ever hop off any dick?
    3. You know he’s officially been declared RiRi’s Bitch, right?
    4. What, you don’t believe her????
    5. I thought it was after the “In Da Club” hype died down..
    6. “You betcha!”
    7. No! what the swagger? swagger is swaggerific, it’s just one of those words.
    8. Maybe he should leak another pic of him gettin’ it? Just to keep it balanced, ya know.
    9. Nah, Closer was bangin.
    10. Who?
    11. Does Rihanna owe Prince child support is a better question.
    12. Zzzz…
    13. Not much, I’ve tried, people’s cheap in these days!
    14. Nahh, but I do blame her for breaking my ankle everytime “Single Ladies” comes on.(you gotta try the dance, it’s inevitable)
    15. sounds good.
    16. Obama’s ballin.
    17. A cover up/excuse to give someone else a love show.
    18. nuhhhhh uhhhhh, Sheree is too elite for that.
    19. As soon as you screw over everyone in America.
    20. Maybe that’s the real reason Aubrey got the boot? Failed attempt..

    -Tay.

  8. daniecal says:
    January 20, 2009 at 2:15 am

    1) She takes pictures for “urban” blogs to ponder her “relevance”

    2)Why? to establish her own identity? GTHOH

    3)Doesnt everyone with acess to Youtube.

    4) Delusion is her drug of choice.

    5)Gawd I hope so! you’d think he’d have the epiphany after recording “Candy Shoppe”………

    6)Not as long as Fox News is around, they even have “Joe The Pluber” in thier roundtable discussions!bwhahahahahahah, “news”

    7)NO till then We’ll just have to wait for rappers to tell us what other words to parrot.

    8)I try to defend him, he gives me nothing.

    9)YES.

    10) EH. I would but I aint tell her to record long distance, let a stan tell it she’s “timeless”.

    11)He’s repaying her in black leather, and Dark and Lovely.

    12)Hey it wasnt that boring, I stayed awake the whole movie, waiting for them to get to the damn plot I already predicted in the 1st 20mins.

    13) Its 2009 what the hell can anybody do with dignity? better luck selling nail clippings.

    14) Beyonce controlleth all things.

    15)Yes. Thats totally logical.

    16) CUz its full of your people.

    17) The gayest term in the history of gayness.

    18)I thought pretending she was rich was her real occupation.

    19)Bank Of America is the devil. Dont hold your breath.

    20) Amy let him smoke some of that good stuff, cant tell that nigga nuthin. Besides he did my a white dinner jacket! talk about preparedness!

  9. Eb the Celeb says:
    January 26, 2009 at 10:03 am

    lmao… I could rebut a couple but overall I laughed!