Bobby B.

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So we’re clear: I’m likely to blog about any and every new ign’t dance that comes out from now until the wheels fall of on this site. Someone referred to me as a ghetto bird for this, but I resent that. I may like dances from people who act as if they should come with a biscuit, but I’m a fucking classy guy.

Many thanks go out to the reader from Dallas who let me know that the dance is ‘Bobby B’ and not ‘Bobby V.’ As soon as I read that I went straight to YouTube and looked for the dance. This is my new favorite song in the entire world — at least until the next one drops in a week or so.

If you can make out the gibberish Dunn Deal would call lyrics, you’re likely to catch a couple of references to the Kang of R&B. Some of you may be new to The Cynical Ones, but let it be known that I love Bobby Brown. “Roni” is one of my favorite songs in the entire world, and “Rock Wit Cha,” “On Our Own,” and “My Prerogative” still earn rotation on my iPod.

I even like singing “Thug Lovin'” whenever I have strep throat. I think it’s great that Bobby Brown has his own little ode now. He deserves it. Usher may have more money, a wife who could double as his bodyguard, and more success, but he doesn’t have his own jig, so who’s really Mr. Entertainment?

One day I hope to have my own little ign’t dance created in my honor. Something that is themed around getting low, raising your drink, and throwing your hood up. Yeah, that would be great.

Though I love this song now and am so glad I found the mp3, I have to admit after a couple of other videos I became a little hesitant to fully embrace the Bobby B.

There are a lot of things wrong with this video. The first would be his head and why it looks like it belongs in another decade. The second would be why his shirt looks like it was designed by McDonalds’ ad department. Then there is the way he’s doing the dance.

It looks like my dougie and a double stanky legg. There’s a little too much going on. I refuse to get a gumby and do the most like homie in the clip. Thankfully, I spotted another one.

Much better. This dance is way better than the previous two I mentioned. The Halle Berry looks a little too project AKA-ish and the Ricky Bobby reminds me of being a crossing guard back in elementary.

Please keep the dances coming, ya’ll. I plan to jig at my wedding, my divorce, and my funeral should I get special permission.

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