Morning Jig
Yes, that’s me dancing on the sidewalk. Don’t act like you’ve never done it.
If you don’t have health care and refuse to commit a crime, I have the next best solution to taking anti-depressant drugs. When you wake up in the morning, give yourself time to lounge around a little, meditate, maybe even channel your inner T-Boz — do whatever morning vice(s) work for you basically. Then, turn on your computer or grab your iPod and turn on the most ignorant song you have. The second you start hearing some functioning illiterate talk about guns, ass, cash, or all of the above from your speakers or headphones, get up and dance.
If you have enough time, find another song and then repeat the step.
Yesterday, a friend of mine told me that I get more ign’t by the day. That may very well be true, but you know what? Whenever I take a minute to jig and act the fool solo, I feel much better. There have been times where I wanted to commit jihad against people who could very well be their own birth control ad, but instead of blowing up at them I turn on my music and let it go.
No, this isn’t praise dancing. It’s more like p-poppin, only we’re not gonna call it that because that would make me sound like I should come in a box with a biscuit and Cajun fries. I don’t need any of you leaving comments like “cluck if you buck.”
My taste may be a little different than yours, but here are a few songs that help me start my day.
UGK – “Take It Off”
A classic and don’t you ever forget it.
The Hot Boys feat. Big Tymers – “I Need A Hot Girl”
Second verse same as the first.
Trina – “Look Back At Me”
She may act like she’s a Sunday School teacher on Twitter, but we know better.
DJ Duck – “Buss It Open”
OK, so I already know you’re judging me, but in my defense, I was trying to be classy about it so I avoided better songs like “Monkey On That Dick” and “Gimme What You Got (For A Porkchop).” I imagine anyone from New Orleans, other parts of the Boot, and Houston and Dallsa didn’t flinch one bit at the song titles.
Geisha – “Shit’n On You Hoe”
I think Fresh everyday for bringing this song to my life. When you are feeling down, turn this on and remind yourself that you are beautiful, intelligent, wonderful, and if you twist it the left, to the right…to the left, right, left, right.
Sidenote: There’s nothing like driving with this song blasting and scaring older Korean women. True story.
Guy – “Groove Me”
Don’t even try it. This song may be as old as segregation to ya’ll, but I love it and if I choose to sometimes dance like flat tops and acid wash still matter, let me make it.
Apollonia 6 – “Sex Shooter”
I think the best way to dance to this song is on a public street in midtown New York with a woman six months pregnant (true story), but I know easier said than done in Kentucky or Korea (hey, I don’t have a passport, but my blog does) so try the mirror in your bathroom or something. Just be sure you don’t drop your iPod in the water trying to kiss the gun (true story).
I’m going to cut the list now, because if I keep going this will turn into an anthology long entry. If you follow me on Twitter, I usually share my morning jig track of the day.
Also, Kid Fury has the feature “Hoodrat track of the day.” That’s a good way to build up your collection.
You may think I sound crazy, but trust me, this helps quell my desire to throw my Blackberry against the wall — and I just bought that phone.
For the record, as I’ve said previously, make sure you maintain some sense of spirituality. Bird anthems can only do so much for the soul. Jesus before jig, Allah before Absolut, all that.
That being said, for those of you who won’t act too good, what gets you going in the AM?
Anonymous
June 9, 2009 at 8:22 am
Lately my morning pick me up has been "Rich off cocaine" Rick Ross.. or Valley of Death.
BTW..Love your blog
I Stan For Cynics
June 9, 2009 at 10:06 am
well my morning usually begins w/my good morning mix of songs like "video," "you gotta be," and other india.arie joints.
HOWEVER, i do secretly hear "take it off! take it off! and let a first class n***a break you off…" in my head at random moments during the day. lol. also, let me know where you got that geisha mp3 from! i could use that. LOL. "gettin' the monies…"
Misty Knight
June 9, 2009 at 4:35 pm
1)I Get Crazy -Nicki Manaj feat Lil Wayne
2)I'm Goin In-Drake, Weezy, Tru Life
3)Be Your Girl Teedra Moses
4)Kinda Like A Big Deal -Clipse feat Kanye
Erica
June 9, 2009 at 4:49 pm
Always strapped- lil wayne and baby
More gangsta music- juelz and cam
Get loose- t.i & nelly
Booty dew- g.s. boys
The beats just makes me happy and all I wanna do is p-pop.
Side note: my word verification was jecian, that would be a cute boy name "jay-ci-han" whew lord take me now, I have listened to and appreciated too many hood rat tracks
Dr. Kiti
June 9, 2009 at 7:49 pm
I don't have a real morning music ritual but I like to pop in bullshit while I drive. I like Kelis, Pussycat Dolls, and any kind of really angry aggressive rock or rap…you know, to get me going.
That said, every friday I need a little boost so I wear purple and play Prince all day. It does wonders for my productivity!
MissTee
June 10, 2009 at 5:02 pm
D*** Pleaser-Lil Wayne
Couldn't Be a Better Player-Lil Jon/Too (Original beat for D Pleaser)
Shawty Say-Trina
Smoke By Myself-Ying Yang Twins
I Don't Give A F***-Lil Jon
Blow The whistle-Too Short
Gettin' some Head-Shawnna & the RMX
ICE CREAM PAINT JOB (don't even kno who its by!)
Britt
June 11, 2009 at 11:12 am
RIP to the Pimp. I am REALLY feeling the Drake mixtape right now. When I am doing well I stream the John P Kee station on Pandora and get hype for Jesus!!!
Britt
June 11, 2009 at 11:13 am
@ MissTee – IceCream paint job is by a Dallas artist named Durrough. http://www.myspace.com/dorroughmusic
Darby
June 11, 2009 at 2:22 pm
ummmm I dont like that not so sly dig at the N.O. lol… dont judge us by the titles of our songs. We also have "dodge that dick"… which, is you know, in some essence, promoting abstinence…. or something like that
MissTee
June 12, 2009 at 2:18 am
@Britt, thx
Jesus Stole My Bike
June 12, 2009 at 2:21 am
Khia "Fuck Dem Other Hoes"
GEISHA !!!!!
Trina "Niggas ain't shit" and anything from her catalog except Glamorest Life
Khaled "Bitch I'm From Dade County"
Pussycat Dolls "Flirt" (random bullshit that gets me by)
Luda "What's your Fantasy" remix
Soulja Girl "Soulja Girl Techno Remix"!!
sloane
June 12, 2009 at 3:03 am
doodoo brown by uncle luke.
MzVirgo
June 24, 2009 at 7:31 pm
Stay High and Poppin my Collar by Three 6 Mafia gets me going. And the entire CD of Raekwon's "Only Built for Cuban Linx"…..brings out my inner thug lol.