Try Again, Robin

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Correct me if I’m wrong, but this is the same dude who used to look like Jesus and ride his bike around NYC, correct?

Oh, so it is. I guess the evolution of Robin Thicke continues.

First off, the man has some nice songs here and there but he’s no Teena Marie. Shade aside, as jig-friendly as I like my music there are certain people I expect more than club-ready tracks from. Ideally, he’s one of them. I say ideally because he’s shown evidence that his musical stylings are rooted in whatever is hot at the moment.

He flopped the first time then hooked up with the Neptunes to become Justin Timberlake’s older blue eyed soul brother. On the last album he auditioned to be Marvin Gaye’s vanilla understudy, which earned him a total fail from Soundscan. And since there ain’t nothing going on but the rent he’s now trying to make everyone loop that ass in the club.

I’ve read the comments about this clip. Collectively, ya’ll seem to like this song. Eh, I can’t jig to it. Robin Thicke just doesn’t seem like that guy. He’s giving me Mr. Schuester vibes. Look at the way he’s dancing. Are you ready to see him on stage with Nicki Minaj (who more and more sounds like a mix of Miss Swan and a project chick from the U.K. to me) hollering, “Young Money?!”

This new direction looks like a John Legend like-ploy to crossover. “Green Light” was a hot song, but John Legend went platinum twice with his first two albums and neither offered singles that garnered much airplay. But, in his mind, he needed to crossover. He did with one single and the third album went gold.

So go ahead, Robin. Trade in your Jesus sandals for a hot 16 from the Accidental Accent. I get it, but if I find you’re working with Soulja Boy, I quit you.

This is why my taste in contemporary R&B from men is stuck in 1995. These new breed Negroes and those who are inspired to sing like them don’t get it. Last time I checked, “Lost Without You” is one of his biggest hits. Ya’ll are so lucky I sound like slow death when I sing. Otherwise I’d mumbling like D’Angelo and giving ya’ll raw emotion. And twirks.

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