I Need Answers

1. Is it wrong that I don’t mind Brandy spitting hot fire (© Dylan)?

2. Does J.Lo realize the fall on her ass at the AMAs won’t hurt nearly as bad as the flip flop her album does on the charts?

3. Is Susan Boyle’s voice [that] Earth shattering or are people more stuck on the fact that something that sounded even remotely pretty came out of her mouth?

4. Either way, are you happy that someone without a lace front, Autotune, or rapper to donate 16 bars on a given track that doesn’t know how to cram their coochie in front of the camera sold so many units?

5. Anyone else now more concerned about Alicia Keys cheating on soul music than with Mashonda’s husband?

6. Can I get a show of hands about who’s been disappointed in President Obama lately?

7. Did someone bounce a check to Rihanna’s hair stylist?

8. Are my ears deceiving me or are the two and a half female rappers left all trying to rhyme like Nicki Minaj?

9. With word of cast members of The Real Housewives of New Jersey going to court over a weave snatching incident, who else is happy that the most hood edition of the series doesn’t involve the colored folk? (No shade, white people. Smile.)

10. Which do you think is harder: Lil’ Kim sticking to one face or Nicki Minaj choosing only one fake accent to speak/spit in?

11. Why do athletes and entertainers make it so easy for jump offs to come up?

12. If Usher drops one more weak leaked track should he just give it up and apply to be Chris Brown’s life coach?

13. Speaking of Chris Brown, since he can’t seem to stop talking about “the incident” with the press, how long before he starts giving interviews to high school newspaper editors and Girl Scouts?

14. Is this Mario and/or J.Holiday’s future?

15. Couldn’t Jay Leno be Khloe Kardashian’s father?

16. Does it even matter now that Justin Timberlake wants to express “regret” for not being there for Janet after the Superbowl controversy five years after the fact?

17. Can someone explain to me what the hell a Tila Tequila is and why it still gets any sort of media attention?

18. Describe the relationship between Mo’Nique and your ear drums.

19. What’s Al thinking in this picture?

20. Why does everyone and their color blind mama think they’re a stylist these days?