Pausing The Pausers
I don’t get heterosexual men who go out of their way to point out seemingly homosexual behavior.
Like the Pause Police. Isn’t it gay in itself to be fishing for anything that seems “gay?” Shouldn’t the pause police pause itself?
Before they lock themselves up for their own criminal acts can they send these two to whatever fictitious gay jail they’re supposed to go to?
Riddle me this: If you see something that makes you uncomfortable what do you do? Do you look away? Do you forget it ever happen? Do you say “eww” like a six-year-old and then move on?
Or do you grab your Web cam and make a video out of something that supposedly bothers you beyond belief? And if you do shoot for the latter option, how does viewing said nasty behavior in slow motion helping you cope? Why would you go out of your way to do this? You know, since it troubles your spirit so much.
After you answer those questions for me can you then explain what exactly “Masonic homosexuality” means?
Is that that new-new? As in some new revelation never heard of before? Oh em gee, folks. Is the Devil gay?! You mean to tell me that the then angel Lucifer was booted from heaven for other reasons besides being jealous of God and trying to drum up trouble? Was Luci-Lu actually banished for trying to blow another male angel’s harmonica? I’m asking because Masons are like devil worshipers, right?
So that in itself explains why Lebron is giving his teammate a preview of the after after party? Because Jay-Z made him a Mason and Satan made Hov a Mason and since Masons are gay they do gay shit like that in the video?
Is your brain ready to retire yet? Mine is so that means I better fall back down to Earth before it’s too late.
“Look at this 6-foot, 8 faggot.”
Really? This coming from a man who watched this in slow motion with another man. I would hate to stereotype, but is anyone else thinking those two went and made their own clip following the conclusion of this little production?
I truly want to understand why so many “straight men” are enamored with anything that seems gay. No shade to you straight people, but I take no interest in heterosexual sexual eruptions. If I could use any word to describe my reaction to them it would be the word “ick.”
I’m half-kidding, but I think you understand what I’m getting at. I don’t go out of my way to fish for something that supposedly repulses me. Why are these two and so many (many!) black purportedly heterosexual men like them not following suit?
Take a moment on that and then follow me along to my next inquiry: Obviously gay men who think the world hasn’t a clue. What prayer do I need to say in order to save them from themselves?
The other night I had a housewarming. Someone there, who I know (who may one day read this site and if they do, bygones, but I’m not lying so…) questioned me at the end of the evening if anyone “knew about him.”
Translation: None of those female friends of yours think I’m gay, right?
Oh no, of course not. Heavens to megatroid. Why would they think such a thing? I mean, you’re dressed all “thuggish” and Alpha-black male like. You look like “trade” and in no way could “trade” ever appear that way.
Nu uh. Not even.
The minute that person arrived someone pulled me to the side to ask if he was gay. I, politely declined to answer but you want to know why they wondered?
Because despite this person’s posturing and costuming he had what looked like to many as some tattoo that only someone like Mariah Carey would get. It looked like a butterfly. I got the urge to turn on “Honey” after spotting it. Considering that song’s subject matter, it’s actually a very appropriate tune for the occasion.
However, in this person’s mind they hadn’t a clue, he just wanted to be sure because he thought one of my friends wanted to holla.
Bless his heart. And his tattoo artist. She did not. At all.
You couldn’t tell him nothing, though.
In hindsight, me being so forthright about, well, everything, probably has alienated me among many in my age group and shared melanin count – especially those who don’t rock a tiara, couldn’t pronounce Louboutin, and is irritated by Beyonce (the horror) but still very much adhere to the qualifications for membership to Team Peen.
I’ve kind of accepted such already, but as we move forward into a new decade I don’t know how much more of this nonsense I can take. Men watching other men in “gay-esque” positions and gay men trying to “look straight” to get the attention of a woman who not only had a boyfriend, but already suspects he may have one, too. It’s nuts. No pun intended.
Don’t even get me started on what my friend has dubbed the “straight gay” dudes. Another day, another post…which will likely turn into a book.
In sum: All of these folks are crazy and I hope a doctor prescribes each and every one of them to start staying at least 50 feet away from January 1, 2010 and beyond.
Pause.
Marikai
December 21, 2009 at 3:21 pm
I love your use of .gifs and video. Nice.
uberVU - social comments
December 21, 2009 at 4:01 pm
Social comments and analytics for this post…
This post was mentioned on Twitter by marikai: RT @youngsinick: New post: Pausing the Pausers: http://bit.ly/4R3d1y….
Kjen
December 22, 2009 at 3:54 am
‘Gay pauses’ are like the adult-ish version of saying “Not it!” or “First one knew it, blew it.” If you call out the “gay” behavior/looks first to your friends, then you ensure that you yourself are in fact not gay.
And about the guys watching pauses together…hmm, all experiences are better when you share them?
Cam
December 23, 2009 at 5:02 pm
You better tell ‘em… and yeah… i’m lovin the gifs as well…
yourfriendlyenemy
December 26, 2009 at 2:52 pm
The pot calling the kettle black eh? Why is it that Gays search out anything that they think is “Intolerant” or ” “homophobic ” in the least bit and blog about, make videos about it, cry about etc. The motives comes from the same place.
Don’t even get me started on you talking about “seemingly homosexual” behavior and then in the same breath throw someone under the bus for what YOU consider a “seemingly homosexual” tattoo. Can a “gay” only call that type of thing out? Are the straight men not clever enough to do as you do? *sighs* you get the point Mikey
Michael
December 26, 2009 at 3:43 pm
One, I check World Star Hip Hop everyday so I’m not searching anything out. The video was there. If you go onto the site then after a while you notice that there’s routinely a bunch of videos that speak on “gay shit.” Had I went out and searched for the video myself and uploaded then I would be the one “searching out for it.” I didn’t create the pause police. I didn’t create the video. I didn’t develop the phrase “no homo.” I didn’t create homophobia nor the societal norms that make it a daily instance in many people’s lives. That’s not the pot calling the kettle black. It’s you thinking you’re clever but you’re actually grossly misinformed.
Secondly, given the fact that I’ve pointed out routinely several times on this site over the years that some stereotypes – though largely exaggerated – tend to have some nominal level of truth to them me pointing out the actual gay dude’s feminine tattoo isn’t an instance of double standards. Actually, I was pointing out the tragic irony in him dressing a certain way and behaving in a manner that seems “more straight” yet his true self shines through. And given I’ve known this person for years, am well aware of how they behaved before they tried to appear “straighter,” again, I know of what I speak. You clearly do not.
I don’t recall saying only gay people can point out things related to gay culture, mannerisms, and the like. Who said anything about straight men not being clever? Has a nerve been struck?
But if you think two men purportedly [so] disgusted with homosexuality taking the time to create a video of something that appears accidental and tying into some rant about homosexuals and cult theories is comparable to a gay dude lying about being gay with a feminine tattoo on the back of his neck, then well enjoy living in that world. In the meantime, I’ll remain in mine.
And yeah, I get the point you [thought] you were making. My opinion remains the same.
yourfriendlyenemy
December 26, 2009 at 3:55 pm
Well I definitely struck a nerve with YOU. As long as you received the point that I MADE then we are cool. And yeah I follow you on twitter, I’m somewhat of a supporter of you Michael.
Michael
December 26, 2009 at 4:00 pm
No, you didn’t strike any nerve with me. I think people sometimes confuse a lengthy response with some sort of emotional attachment. It took me all but 90 seconds to write that. My feelings are in tact. I appreciate your support, but I didn’t care for the accusation. I didn’t fish anything out. It was already there. What you did is akin to some white people forever asking, “Why are you black people always looking to call something racist?” Short answer to both: You typically don’t have to go far to find it.
Ratchet
December 26, 2009 at 4:08 pm
*looks above*
YASS MIKE! DRAG HER! lol.
yourfriendlyenemy
December 26, 2009 at 4:22 pm
You are doing it again…it’s such a shame you don’t see it. ….good day Mikey
Michael
December 26, 2009 at 4:40 pm
I’m not doing anything. I honestly didn’t think your post made much of a point.
“Why is it that Gays search out anything that they think is “Intolerant” or ” “homophobic ” in the least bit and blog about, make videos about it, cry about etc. The motives comes from the same place.”
This is a baited, uninformed, and arguably nonsensical statement. I’m not sure how else you wanted me to respond other than pointing out: A. I didn’t fish out anything it was there. B: No, they’re not coming from the same place.
You’re not making any sense to me. Period.
“Don’t even get me started on you talking about “seemingly homosexual” behavior and then in the same breath throw someone under the bus for what YOU consider a “seemingly homosexual” tattoo. Can a “gay” only call that type of thing out? Are the straight men not clever enough to do as you do? *sighs* you get the point Mikey”
These are assumptions you made based on your own preconceived notions. Don’t make insinuations based on something that was made clear from the jump and even further explained. And for further clarification I didn’t even notice his tattoo initially. It was the friends of mine who saw it then thought to ask about it and him. Once I did look at it, yeah…I got it.
Back on point what you did is make a comment that didn’t make any sense and then deflect when responded to by pointing out non-existent “emotionally-latent retorts.” If anything, [your] response points to you [feeling] a certain type of way — it’s evident from your assertion that gays “search out for things to cry about.”
A hit dog will holler. But don’t holler nonsense at me thinking I won’t rebuff it.
Good day to you, too.
YOURFRIENDLYENEMY
December 27, 2009 at 11:34 am
The dog did holler.
Michael
December 27, 2009 at 11:55 am
Ah, another evasive yet cutesy response. I’m so surprised.
Misty Knight
December 27, 2009 at 12:13 pm
*sigh* @ “masonic homosexuality”-this is what happens when kids are being educated by the Youtube.
Why ?
Laureli
December 27, 2009 at 10:05 pm
What is with all this Illuminati/Mason garbage out there these days? I mean why does every successful black person out there supposedly belong to these organizations? Its crazy and im sick of hearing it.