Oh Joy, Another Banger for the Birds
The last time I wrote about Plies a commenter by the name of “Mrs. Plies” acted as if she was ready to bash me over the head with her Uncle’s Pimp Cup after I dared to speak ill of Catfish Mouth’s new video.
Well, Mrs. Plies, I suggest you floss in advance that way you can suck your teeth for the next few minutes without finding any surprises.
What in the I miss MC Hammer hell is this? Who says things like, “I want to turn you into a spoiled brat?” And not just an occasional spoiled brat, Plies wants to turn his lucky lady into one “sebum dayz ah weak.” Why is he talking like that? Negro, we know you just started a college fund. Quit fronting.
Only 23 seconds into this video I’m tempted to turn it off. But I suppose I should give him the benefit of the doubt.
Wrong! It gets worse.
Soon after Plies is possessed by the spirit of Ja Rule because he starts singing like the swamp remix version of the Harlem Boys Choir. Rappers want to sing. Singers want to rap. Why can’t anyone stick to what they’re barely tolerable at anymore?
Then come the trite lyrics for a song we’ve already heard a million times before. You know, one of those tracks “for the ladies” that inspires a bunch of women to continue to throw out their coochie for commerce with the hopes that one day some man with enough clout to get on a gossip blog can scoop them off their feet and send them regular child support checks before dropping their ass back on the ground.
Or as Plies sells it buying you fancy clothes, big jewelry, and sending you tickets to places most people can’t even pronounce.
Because you can have whatever you like. Say, you can have whatever you like.
As big a fan I am of T.I. I hated that song, too.
Although most rappers end up living off of Red Lobster’s cheddar biscuits once they spend their heavily garnished royalty checks on their car lease, their jewelry rentals, and multiple two-piece combos for their crews.
Are people not tired of being sold this ridiculous fantasy?
I guess not because I saw a lot of comments focused on how catchy the song is, how they can’t wait to lead a similar lifestyle and how attractive they find Plies to be.
It would be mean of me to wish for Mother Goose to scramble their eggs so I’ll just say bless your heart and your deductive reasoning.
In sum, I hate the song, hate the message, seen the video 120 times in the last five years already, and would love it if the world took a moratorium on trick anthems.
CJ
April 19, 2010 at 10:27 am
Ever since I found your blog, I have loved it…and this post is a prime example of why I do. I thought no one else was sick of these lying, faking, hypocritical n*ggas!!!
I will now take this as an opportunity to enlighten a few Mrs. Plies’ who will post a comment….thank me later.
1. You will never get spoiled by ANY rapper because nine chances out of ten- HE AIN’T GOT IT.
2. You ever wonder why every once in a while, some nigga drops a “feel good, woman anthem”?? In case you didn’t know the reason, let me tell you: coochie. That’s right! You’re not the only one who thinks he’s talking directly to you
3. Seriously though….you REALLY believe this shit he’s talking?
4. Last but not least, I’ll tell you how this will play out. You’ll go to a Plies show, if you have a fatty and a semi-decent face you’ll get back stage, perform some type of sexual favor (while thinking that he’s going to make you a spoiled brat- don’t front, that’s what you think), and then he’s going to forget you. You probably won’t even get cab fare.
If you feel like calling me a hater- please don’t. It will just make you look even more delusional than you are. Keep those thoughts to yourself.
That’s all for now….Ciao
JoshZilla
April 19, 2010 at 12:35 pm
Thank you. I thought I was the only person who hates Catfish Mouth, but you took the words right out my mouth. If i hear his voice, I change the channel, station or whatever he is infecting with his dumb ass. UGH. The fact that the music industry allows shit like this to get made and the fact that people actually buy his music.. well that is just…
Dr Kiti
April 19, 2010 at 5:57 pm
*Hugs* @ CJ!!
I try to explain this to people but I swear these chirruns today have no tolerance for reality. Thank you for being so blunt and honest
kJen
April 19, 2010 at 7:20 pm
With the recession still being felt by the public, forget the positive stories about the stock market rebounding, I’m not surprised that these fantasies still reverberate with so many people. Actually, there should be more people than usual who are hoping/praying that they will luck into someone that will take them away from the grind because it seems as if there will be no end in sight just based on their work alone.
Can’t show too much disdain. I’ve had “the-one-time-I-buy-a-lottery-ticket-I-win-a-Billion-dollar” dreams myself.
CJ
April 20, 2010 at 9:19 am
@Dr Kitti it’s really just so sad because some females will have a serious argument- damn near fist fight- over some of these people they don’t even know if you try to talk to them about the swindle! Hopefully one day they will wake up and realize the real
Dr Kiti
April 20, 2010 at 4:46 pm
never did understand these chicken head ass lil kids fighting over someone they never met and never will meet, calling them their boyfriends, baby daddies and ‘husbands’. I swear if I see one more 12 year old talking about how Plies, Gucci Mane or Wacka -Flocka-Whatevah is their boyfriend…
Drea
April 21, 2010 at 3:25 pm
I also hate PLIES. Could not stand him since he first came out. I hate his fake thug grammar. I hate the content of his songs. I hate the fact that he plays down his intelligence. (I remember reading that he’s a college grad or at least has some education past high school.) I HATE PLIES, I HATE PLIES, I HATE PLIES.
Aimay
April 22, 2010 at 9:44 pm
I absolutely agree with everything you’ve said… and I’m about to go find an illegal download anyway.
This is why we cannot advance as a people.
J2201987
April 23, 2010 at 12:55 am
And the funny things is, he speaks proper English better than most “educated” people.
J
April 26, 2010 at 8:55 pm
Where is the song celebrating getting an education and being able buy things for your damn self. Prince Charming only exists in fairy tales. Work hard save your money and you should be able to live comfortably.
Gabrielle, the Taj
May 8, 2010 at 10:34 pm
^ because even getting an education to become successful isn`t guaranteed anymore. Yeah, the view is bleak from over here in educated land, too. The recession is forcing people back to school to get degrees, which is taking down the value of education just like what happens to the value of the dollar. Too many people get it, and its no longer valuable. Now, you`ve got folks taking out $100,000 loans and bankrupting themselves to go to graduate schools, all in hopes of achieving the American Dream the “right” way.
Fuck it, where`s Plies? I need someone to buy my textbooks. -______- (<denotes sarcasm)