Girl, Get Up

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Not to sound insensitive, but of all people who are afforded a pass for pulling a Donnie McClurkin minus the penis Rihanna is the last person I would pay it forward to.

When Beyonce slips and fall it’s because she’s typically twirking every last calorie of her two-piece dinner off her body.

When Lady GaGa falls to the floor it’s spurred by her exhaustion levels — which developed because the constant perfectionist is giving her all on stage.

I can even understand why Michelle Williams can fall. As a late bloomer on the team skinny side of life let me warn you about what a strong wind might do to us. Besides, I still don’t doubt that Sasha Fierce pushed her out of the way for stepping into her light.

That said, I get why they might take a tumble but not Rihanna.

Although I did write that post about Rih-Rih improving as a performer, it’s not like she’s started doing acrobats during her performance.

She still walks from left to right only every seventh step she puts a twist and dip into it. That’s commendable for her, but c’mon nah, that’s no reason to fall.

I didn’t laugh when she fell for fear that the Illuminati would get me got over a giggle, but I will say this: Girl, get up.

You weren’t walking in stilettos nor were you doing anything your choreographer spent hours teaching you to do. You were walking to remind the other people in the arena to wake their tired asses up.

Kidding, kidding…kinda.

I will give the girl one thing, though: Despite initially looking ready to fly into space on the fall, she made up for it by dropping to the ground and humping it. That’s totally something I would expect her to do.

Bravo on that, Rihanna.

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