Mama Flocka, I Love You

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I think I’ve fallen in love with Waka Flocka Flame’s mama. Seriously, watch this video and pay very close attention. Where has Debra Antney been all of our lives?

Now, I am no stranger to hood parents. In fact, given my dad used to steal my sister’s No Limit CDs to entertain the unemployed and newly released outside of our house, has trimmers of gold in certain areas of his mouth, and offered me a gun for college I’d say I was pretty much an expert in that department.

Growing up, it would sometimes irritate the shit out of me. Well, that amongst other things. Longtime readers know what I mean. Despite all that, I’m fascinated by Mama Flocka.

Just listen to the way she starts off this interview with All Hip Hop.

“So, you think I’m gonna start some shit again, but I’m not even though I really want to.”

She is not your typical gangsta mama. This is a star, people. Recognize.

She speaks with such confidence. And yeah, aggression. Goodness, I love a woman who could probably bitch slap a man so hard he’ll take a piss sitting down for two weeks. I can only imagine what a business meeting like her is like.

As a matter of fact, I wish President Obama employed her to lobby for health care reform. I bet if you had her visiting various holdouts in the Senate that bill would’ve gotten signed a lot sooner than it did — and with a public option.

So, I don’t really care about the actual dispute with VIBE magazine she’s addressing (if you do care, VIBE posted audio of Wacka Flocka Flame), I just wanted you all to join me in basking in her greatness.

She is her own publicist. She is a businesswoman. She is a personality. A renaissance woman, for sure.

Better yet, as she put it: “I ain’t no damn manager. I do a lil’ bit of everythang. I am the crea-tah.”

Yes you are, ma’am. All that and then some. A triller Mathew Knowles, if you will.

I love the fact that despite losing Nicki Minaj and Gucci Mane, she’s still looking for talent to provide me thoughtless music that I can shake my ass to on the dance floor (and your local sidewalk should a car drive-by blasting some dope shit).

I love it even more that she recognizes that Texas is chock full of undiscovered talent (that people from other regions bite extra hard from without giving proper credit, but I digress) and now realizes she needs to change her business acumen as she moves forward with new clients.

In other words: “No more hand shakes, but for the most part leave my people the hell alone. Stay out of their got damn ears. Stay out of it. Got damn haters.”

Please put her on the “Hard In The Paint” remix, Waka. She would kill it. And world, give this woman a reality show. Now.

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