Happy Birthday, Satan! From Mya With Love

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Now do you see why I wrote that post about Mya a few months ago? I had feared that she was heading towards rock bottom. Well, her cushion is clearly sitting on something swole now. An object that won’t lead to a child support check. Really, ya’ll have you ever heard a birthday song sound so eerie?

If you sang this to me on my birthday, I’d fear I would never enjoy another.

This literally sounds like a lullaby for Satan. I wouldn’t be shocked if you played this backwards and it said, “The temperatures will rise, the darkness wil fall, the beast will bring the masses to their knees & Christina Aguilera will behead Lady GaGa.”

I imagine this song isn’t for Americans, but that makes it even worse when you think about. I mean, hasn’t America done enough to the world? Why are we still purposely trying to tick folks off?

As Keith reminded me, only a year or so ago was Mya the H-Town chick by way of Washington, D.C. And now, she’s paying homage to Christine O’Donnell’s teen years with this. He’s right when he says, “Find an identity.”

P.S. Find another producer, too. No shade to DJ Drew G., but this sound isn’t for Mya.

If Mya wanted to make something that was Halloween friendly, she would’ve done better remaking “I Put A Spell On You” from Hocus Pocus.

Really, though, Mya, you could’ve easily stuck with, “Ah-Say-Into-Pie Oppa-Maybe-Uppen-Die Ah-Say-Into-Pie.”

Because this shit, this right here…is for the birds. Black birds. That swarm the decaying carcass’ of roadkill or soon to be terminated babysitters in a horror film.

Now, if this kind of music is your thing then that’s on you. But, please don’t leave any vengeance spells in my comments section. Trust me, the student loan companies have brought enough fear into my heart. Besides, we all know I’ll hearing this song in my nightmares in due time.

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