I Need Answers

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1. Is anyone else wondering if a North and South Korean are somewhere now in a joint chat session on Skype going, “Man, this Lil’ Kim/Nicki Minaj beef needs to cool down before something serious happens?”

2. If Katy Perry can score an Album of the Year nomination at the Grammys, can I be nominated for a Nobel Peace Prize for the hell of it?

3. Will Raz-B stop testifying on World Star Hip Hop and go try his luck with a real jury?

4. Now that I have Miguel can I stop trying to force myself to like Bruno Mars?

5. Will Rihanna ever realize that just because she keeps saying anyone who criticizers her is unhappy with themselves that doesn’t make it true?

6. Can someone confirm to me that Lori Petty is indeed still alive so I can let go of my theory that Eminem stole her face and body?

7. Wouldn’t it be nice if those who can’t stand Nicki Minaj shut the fuck up about it already and move on with their lives?

8. Will someone please alert the California music scene that Texas artists created their “new dances” two-three years ago and that it’s okay to come up with their own ideas?

9. Although he’s on track for “redemption” with the ample amount of praise for his new album (deservingly so), will Kanye West find some new and interesting ways to mess up all over again?

10. Has anyone set up a virtual prayer circle to ask God to make sure that illiterate illegal alien Kat Stacks gets sent back to Slutonia yet?

11. Did the Kardashians actually think no one was going to criticize them for their Rush card remix?

12. Doesn’t this posthumous Michael Jackson album seem like a bad idea?

13. Try as he might to make us forget, R. Kelly still sticks out like a urine stain on a pearly white toilet, right?

14. Am I the only one who still can’t confirm if Jason Derulo is a real person?

15. Don’t you miss the days when Katrina Kardashian was simply just da baddest bitch?

16. So Diddy = Pam, Dawn = Keisha, Kaleena = Kima?

17. Why are Mortal Kombat fighters in battle friendlier to each other than Trey Songz is to most interviewers?

18. What’s up with the latest tracks from both Lil’ Kim and Foxy Brown sounding like they were recorded on a refurbished BlackBerry?

19. Ever get that feeling that an usher holding a moneybag is standing behind you after you finish reading Monica’s Twitter timeline?

20. In the issue of fairness, can both Raheem DeVaughn and Keri Hilson fall through a trap door?

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