Your Keyboard Should Commit Suicide

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Since I would rather sip champagne mixed with my own piss in a Solo red cup before ever clicking “follow” by his name, I am usually spared the stupidity of Lil’ Duval shares on Twitter.

Unfortunately, the downside of the retweet feature occasionally runs rampant on my timeline. Such was the case yesterday, when I noticed a number of people responding to Duval’s latest round of controversial for sport tweets.

Before you read what he said, just go ahead and bang your head on the desk now and get it over with.

Duval is responding to allegations that Hot 97’s Mister Cee was arrested from being slopped up by the type of girl who has to tape his dick down.

Now, I haven’t really been following the story but from what I gathered Wendy Williams insinuated Mister Cee never met a man with a lifetime supply of duct tape he didn’t like years ago.

Where is Riley Freeman when you need him?

Nevertheless, I just wanted to quickly point out the nonsensical bullshit this ignorant fuck is spewing.

I truly cannot stand that idiotic talking point, “I don’t know why people are still on the DL considering it’s cool to be gay nowadays.”

Lil’ Duval isn’t the only fool with this belief as evidenced by the number of people offering their two cents that would’ve been better spent on an outstanding bill.

Yeah, it’s “cool” to be gay if you’re on a Bravo reality show entertaining the masses as a sassy and sweet gay pet. When you’re not that things are far more complicated. And no matter which side of the rainbow you fall on, you’re still lumped in with the trite stereotype that all gay men are perverts.

Case in point.

It’s so cool to be gay that gay folks are likened to pedophiles.

I need to register as a sex offender ‘cause people need to know my gay ass is in the neighborhood. If we make an addendum to that suggestion by including dimwitted peons shorter than my penis then maybe I’ll consider it.

After reading Duval’s comments I instantly recalled the time I sat in a barber shop with a bunch of men who assumed I was straight, and thus felt like it was okay to start “joking” about how gay men needed to be raped, shot, and used their sissy elbows to rub on the penis of their respective barbers. Oh, but we were at least good tippers.

It also brings attention to a lot of the conversations I’ve had in recent days over who’s still in denial, who’s still living in glass closets, and who’s still double dipping (for the record, this one is)?

Or in some people’s cases, who’s making love to food because they fear the wrath of God over their natural urges calling on someone with the same genitalia to feast on them.

Then you have some of the very comments some people leave here. Sometimes, I wonder if I’m like the homo homophobes feel comfortable confiding in.

Eventually, I’m going to start handing out spermicides for Christmas in order to help thwart this sort of prejudice from continuing with future generations. I’ll also keep working on what’s been keeping me from updating here as frequently as usual. If nothing else, at least I will offer a counterpoint to all of this that’s actually funny.

Until the days come for both scenarios, right now I’ll just stick with: Fuck you, Lil’ Duval. And thank you all for being patient with me. Maybe I’ll share a little of what I’ve been working on for feedback. Or maybe not. We’ll see how my paranoia goes.

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