The Misery Chick

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Since she was such a favorite of mine in the first season of Love & Hip Hop, I’ve been trying to avoid drawing this conclusion about Chrissy Lampkin: She’s insufferable. It’s undeniable pretty hair, pleasant speaking voice, and understandable frustrations about her love life or not. Yes, she was the bright spot in an otherwise dull cast when the show debuted, but I’m not blind to her pattern. Week after week she is shown mad about something and/or somebody.
One episode she’s upset about something that doesn’t even concern her, another she’s blowing something rather insignificant out of proportion in a raging fit. I assume she does these sort of things to avoid her pissed off meter going off kilter and sending her body into a state of shock. Yeah, maybe it’s time for a new lease on life or something.
Apologies aren’t enough for her. Nor is an initial refusal to entertain her grievances with you as it seems Chrissy’s gonna start some trouble regardless of whether one is a willing participant. Yandy might have been on to something when she said, “She mad that I get money and she has to sleep with a nigga to get money.” Chrissy is after all, the Tommy Strong of the show. I don’t care how well taken care of you are, if you’re 40 and have nothing to do with yourself, that’s gotta suck. After Chrissy’s latest temper tantrum I found myself hearing the voice of President Barack Hussein Obama: “Pass this jobs bill now.” Help her find something to do, Speaker Boehner. Or maybe I should be sending an S.O.S. to Dr. Frasier Krane. I mean, who hurt you, Chrissy, and why hasn’t your man found a medical professional who can help you numb the pain?

As for Chrissy’s veiled threats. “If you’re too old for the bullshit” then stop. Plus if you’re going to beat someone’s ass, you’d have already done it. She didn’t have any problem sucker socking Kimbella upside her head. Yandy’s not afraid of her; Yandy’s not pulling a Chef Roblé for her insecurities; Yandy’s no longer up for giving her the time of day. And Chrissy can’t take it.
I still want to like Chrissy, but somebody needs to sit her down, play the “Be Happy ” video and tell her to take the heed. A second option is Madonna’s “Take A Bow” video. Perhaps one viewing of that will convince Chrissy to stop acting like she needs a matador to tame her temper tantrum throwing ass. If all else fails, I’ll be forced to stick with my Daria reference to describe her. Wait, please tell me you caught it?
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