It Doesn’t Matter If Evelyn Lozada Might Be Evil

Evelyn Lozada is evil incarnate. She’s mean, spiteful, a bully, and based on what I’ve seen on Basketball Wives, a loud mouth who uses her bark to deflect from the fact that she can’t fight worth a single a damn. My disdain for the character she portrays on the show is well documented on this site, though I’m more than annoyed at the numerous false equivalencies a lot of people are employing to somehow fault her for allegedly being on the receiving end of a head-butt from her husband, Chad Ochocinco.

Many of these apologists – who, naturally, would prefer people like me pretend that’s not what they’re acting like – share the idea of Stephen A. Smith about how her reality show character is somehow partially to blame for whatever violent act that allegedly took place. Sure, Stephen hits us with the “domestic violence is wrong” and “Chad is still wrong” talking points to deflect deserved criticism, but as soon as he gets to “the way she conducts herself on TV” it’s evident what he really thinks about the situation.

Say when he asks, “How much you wanna make a bet she benefits from this? But Chad the football player, his professional career is in jeopardy.”

Punks jump to get beat down, sir. And the beat down can be it upside his head or whatever is left of Chad’s career.

If Evelyn Lozada hit Chad Ochocinco and caused injury, she deserves being charged, too. Does everyone feel better about me saying that? Great. Let’s move on.

I’m not sure of it being totally fair to cite whatever antics she engages with women she hates on a reality show to insinuate that she might be responsible for her inflicted injuries from her husband. Stephen and the rest of y’all admit that “you don’t know her personally” and that “you weren’t there,” but the same can be said about not thinking your rationale through completely.

Evelyn Lozada may be a bitch on her reality show yet one should take into account that she’s behaved angrily and confrontational on a television show that thrives off anger and confrontation. These programs are called reality shows, however, these shows often feature normal people behaving like props in intentionally abnormal situations.

They give us “real” reactions in carefully tweaked settings.

Kind of like the posers permeating social media. So many people get their jollies acting like dicks on the Web to impress other assholes only to turn out to be “sweet” in person. Who’s to say that’s not the same for Evelyn? I mean, y’all all still suck, for sure, but you get it.

Stephen and other skeptics shouldn’t automatically assume that Evelyn is the same on her off day as she is in front of a camera crew after a production team has filled her head with a bunch of thoughts for the sole purpose of getting the perfect reaction for captivating television.

I was supposed to interview Evelyn about her book earlier in the year (yes, it stung), but it ended up not happening. As soon as I found out I might be doing an assignment on her, my instant reaction was, “Fuck. I’m probably going to end up liking her.” I knew that the villain she portrays on TV is likely not who she is in a different setting.

You know, a more “real” one.

For the record, if you’re going to link Evelyn and her show, you should probably watch the show, Stephen, and not cite criticism against the show launched by a hypocrite. And since we’re talking past behavior, it would have been great if someone at that table mentioned that last Saturday was not the first time Chad had been arrested on charges of putting his hands on a woman.

If you’re going to bring up Basketball Wives, bring up his record.

Stephen’s comments aren’t as despicable as chatter about Evelyn being a hoe, aggressive, a bitch, and so forth, thus “deserving” of what happened to her, but they’re troublesome all the same. Yeah, we don’t know what happened that night, but if you’re going to play devil’s advocate try being a bit more informed and thoughtful.

Speaking of thoughtful, those of you so quick to engage in a paean over VH1 canceling the show can find the nearest seat. Hell, make it fun and play musical chairs first.

“Oh now VH1 wants to be anti-violence.”

“They’re just mad they didn’t catch it on camera.”

“There has to be some other reason behind it. What’s the real reason?”

I’m so tired of folks and their fake ass Scooby Doo and The Mystery Machine bit. Let’s go ahead and slash the tires on the van before anyone drives themselves off a cliff:

As you can see at the top, he gives the masses more credit than I do. But there you have it.

The issue isn’t violence per se. It’s more about how the incident obliterates the entire premise of that particular show. VH1 was pushing ratchet Romeo and Juliet, not Uncle Breezy and Aunt Rihanna, therefore…come on, follow me there. To air it out now in light of recent events would invite all types of criticism.

Ya feel me (read that in Momma Dee’s voice, please)?

It’s unfortunate for Evelyn that she no longer has a chance to show a side of herself different than the monster I loathe on Basketball Wives via her spin-off show, but regardless of what anyone feels about Evelyn no one deserves to be head-butted by the person they married.

Moreover, the fact that she just filed for divorce suggests that she respects herself far more than many of us have given her credit for.



  1. But do you not feel that if she is jumping over tables, throwing wine bottles and popping her Ex-BFF in the head with a clutch behind a perceived slight, how can we say she may not have acted in like fashion finding a condom receipt in her husband's possession?

    If we can't overlook his arrest for DV in 2000, why are we supposed to overlook her behavior 3 months ago? No woman is "asking for it" but at what point do we recognize that there are over aggressive women who will hit a man playing off the notion that he wouldn't hit back?

    How can we say even though he hasn't been in ANY legal trouble in 12 years that he's the one who would be the aggressive liar and not she?

    Just a question.

  2. Oh sidenote, They ABSOLUTELY mentioned Chad's arrest when Skip spoke first.

  3. Shannan Fort says:

    And see, I think you're giving her too much credit…But I don't know this woman, so I'm trying not to be too judgmental. Violence begets violence, yeah, the show may be fake, but those were some real punches she wa throwing, real weave she was pulling and real wine bottles she was hurling. No one deserves to be demeaned, hurt and humiliated by someone they love (unless you're a bad ass little kid in the library), but I can't lie, the first thing that popped into my head was your Gyrator's lyrics, "What goes around comes back around…" I'm wrong, I know it.

  4. Browne says:

    I must admit that I’m guilty of grading domestic violence on a scale of whether a woman presents as defenseless, so to speak or an aggressive, take no prisoners type and should probably check myself on it but not today. Barring the ER visit and the neighbor filing a report I believe this may have been a heated argument by their standards, a situation that would have cooled shortly thereafter.But since the media is involved she had to save face and “do something”,as seem with many reality star divorces and separations, even among siblings. In addition to the alleged abuse being made public, I believe she was affected by those who questioned her self esteem for marrying him and the condom receipt being in the press was once again a “do something”. For the record I tire of outsiders dictating how others choose to live(within reason, of course)I know of couples who curse, jone, embarrass and hit each other and it works for them so who am I to say they aren’t meant for each other.Water finds its own level or something like that. And because she filed for divorce immediately doesnt necessarily mean she has a higher regard for herself than women who stay. We all have our strengths and weaknesses.

  5. PiscesTia says:


    Sir. Did you read the above article at all? Seriously? Are we really saying it is okay for a man to put his hands on his wife, in any fashion, just because she acts that way toward him? Two wrongs don’t make a right. And I find it hard to believe that his ONLY mode of defense was to head butt Evelyn. It’s a damn shame that people feel like anyone deserves any violence bestowed against them.


    *SIGH*. “I know of couples who curse, jone, embarrass and hit each other and it works for them so who am I to say they aren’t meant for each other.”

    Really? Really. It’s called unhealthy relationships. Hitting or embarrassing someone is not a sign of showing love. It’s a sign of someone needing some serious help. Anyone who thinks that cursing/hitting/fighting their significant other could mean they really love each other and this is just how they show their healthy relationship, isn’t seeing clearly. I am BAFFLED by the way society perceives domestic violence, though I guess I shouldn’t be.