Oh, They’re Shattered

Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on Google+Email this to someone

I was not anticipating American Idol to serve as a placeholder for Love & Hip Hop: Atlanta in my heart, but I have learned to accept my blessings as they come to me. As funny as these two have been thus far in their back and forth here and in the press, I didn’t want the rumors of rift to be true. I love them both so much.

I am perpetually praise dancing to “Honey.” I spit Nicki Minaj lines as often as I shower. I don’t like two of my favorites fighting. This is like Beyoncé telling Jesus she heard he was talking shit about her behind her back after their last game of spades and to meet her outside to handle it.

Here are a few pennies, though:

1. Having read the stories leading up to this, they both like not fantastic co-workers. Initial stories were particularly none   too kind to Mariah Carey. It was reported that she wasn’t exactly happy to know that she’d be sharing the panel with another women. She was said to be even less thrilled with Nicki Minaj showing up late as if she’s the one who gave the world Butterfly.

2. If she felt that compelled to do so, Nicki Minaj should’ve waited until it was time for lunch to curse Mariah Carey out. If it’s true that Mimi repeatedly insulted her and called her a bitch, I’d be mad, too. Want to know what would really piss me off, though? Missing an easy $12 million due to my inability to get timing. Mariah knew better than to stoop to touch your toe levels while doing a gig. Yes, I still laugh at this clip, but I’m just saying.

3. Much of the commentary about their tiff shows so many of you folks are turning into your parents. A lot of the scolding of Nicki Minaj reminds me of some respect your elders, you no good kids don’t know good music speeches I have ignored since 1984.

Actually, that’s me being way too polite. Let me get unsouthern. Whatever caused this outburst, I am put off by the idea that Nicki Minaj cannot dare talk to Mariah Carey in any way that’s not complimentary because Mariah Carey is a bigger celebrity.

I saw that Buzzfeed article being passed around that basically argued given Mariah Carey has 18 number one singles, Nicki Minaj should simply bow in the presence of greatness. Do I need to draw some of you celebrity worshipping numbskulls a map to get you the fuck out of here with all that?

By that silly reasoning, Mariah Carey was wrong to be throwing daggers at Madonna back in the 1990s on MTV when Madge was the greater star of the two.

I love Mariah Carey, Lord knows I do, but if or anyone for that matter repeatedly berated me and called me out my name, they would ultimately catch it, too. If Beyoncé told me I was a punk ass bitch who she would throw her weave on if I caught on fire do you think I’m going to say, “Yes, ma’am, Ms. Beyoncé, get me bodied and all the way together?” No, a thousand times.

Nicki Minaj shouldn’t have spoken to her that way on the job. Ultimately, entertaining to anyone or not it is unprofessional, but some of your cousins’ rationale as to why it was wrong is way, way off. And so we’re clear, I love Mariah Carey much more. So much so that I’m going to ignore those Nicki Minaj said she’d shoot me and leave my children motherless tall tales TMZ and Barbara Walters were both way too excited to repeat.

Hopefully, these two will work it out and Nicki will get her tantrums together. Otherwise, Christina Aguilera will us this as an opportunity to compliment her and her rolling chair of a TV talent show in a future interview. We need that even less than a Barbz vs. Lambs knight fact on across the Internet.

Edit: I just turned on the remix of “Always Be My Baby.” Confession: When I met Mariah Carey at a party, I may have mentioned that I was a lamb. I can’t recall, I was intoxicated. Anyway, all I said stands but whew, Mariah is everything.

Share on FacebookTweet about this on TwitterShare on Google+Email this to someone