After several weeks of back and forth negotiations, an alleged public curse outbetween the Speaker of the House of Representatives and the Senate Majority Leader, a call to Vice President Biden and a “please, baby please” plea to Democrats and the thirty sane Republicans left, Congress finally reached an agreement with the White House on the widely publicized “fiscal cliff.”
We already know what the likes of John Boehner, Harry Reid, Nancy Pelosi, Mitch McConnell and Eric Cantor make of the deal, but what do celebrities like Rick Ross, Fantasia, 2 Chainz, Lil’ Wayne, and Azealia Banks have to say on the matter?
In this week’s roundtable, the stars opine on the pressing financial issues facing the country in 2013.
Rick Ross: John Boehner ain’t a boss. Why he let his GOP folk embarrass him like that? I’m saying, if I introduced a Plan B, you better pop that s—t like you’re trying to avoid nine-months of weight gain, you feel? If he the boss, call the shots. Be on the murder team, get Dems to call the cops.
Azealia Banks: Well, to be fair, like, President Obama kind of punked out when he said he wouldn’t budge on the Bush tax cuts for people making over $250,000 expiring. Isn’t it now like at $400,000? Like, that’s sort of wack, right? Like, so what? The middle class includes people making up to $400,000. That’s like crazy, right?
Nicki Minaj: And this “fiscal cliff” law apparently includes breaks for racetrack owners and moviemakers? As if they need more help.
Rick Ross: But hold up, Nick, didn’t you vote for Romney? Isn’t that something he would’ve done?
Nicki Minaj: You guys! I was just kidding. I didn’t vote for Romney. That’s why I said “I did a freestyle then I got a shout out from Obammer.” I was just doing that for attention, silly.
Azealia Banks: Shocker.
Nicki Minaj: Watch it, lil’ mama. Anyway, as I was saying before I was so rudely shaded: I didn’t vote for Romney.
2 Chainz: You didn’t vote at all, right? Like TMZ said you’re not registered.
Azealia Banks: They also said you were two years older than what you’ve been claiming.
Nicki Minaj: I don’t like politics.
Lil’ Wayne: All I need to know is how much more do I have to pay in taxes? I just paid almost $8 million in back taxes.
Rick Ross: You ain’t got nothing to worry about, man. Uncle Sam can’t clock the cash from the drug stash, man. Ain’t that right, codeine cowboy?
2 Chainz: There’s enough bad storytelling in Washington, sir. Let’s save the drug folklore for our collaboration on the next album, playboy.
Fantasia: CAN SOMEONE EXPLAIN TO MEEE WHAT ALL THIS FISCAWL CLIFF STUFF MEANS? IS CLIFF HUXTABLE INVOLVED?
Azealia Banks: Oh, girl.