I’d Like The Kisses More If It Had Choreo

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Oh, Kelly. You and me were doing so well. If you’re a Destiny’s Childogolist, the “Kisses Down Low” video harkens back to Beyoncé’s “Check On It” video, which was inspired by the DC3 video for “Bootylicious,” which nodded to DC 2.0’s “Say My Name” visual. My, my, do my H-Town girls love their splashes of color.

Kelly Rowland looks gorgeous in the clip for her fourth album’s second single, proving once again that cosmetic surgery can do wonders for a person so long as the surgeon doesn’t get too creative. It’s serving you pin-up realness in that Katy Perry, vintage Britney Spears sort of way. I get it, but that’s not what I was hoping for.

What I wanted was something dance-heavy that would give me the kind of choreography I could try to mimic when dancing inappropriate to “Kisses Down Low” in public.

Girl.

Where is your twirk? What happened to your p-pop? Why aren’t you dipping it low, picking it up slow, rolling it all around, poking it out and making your back go…p-p-p-pop that thang?

I’ve seen you on tour. I know you can do this. Hell, you were just giving us cute face, slim waist, thick thighs, ample backside now watch it glide at the Super Bowl.

Why is that not in this video? I know you said you wanted something lighthearted and flirty since the song is so sexually suggestive. Fine, you didn’t want to take it back to Uncut, but hey, the song is still about oral sex. It’s a fantastic song about fellatio at that. It deserves better!

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